Rules to Live By: Don’t Poop on the Bus or Pee on the Lawn

Have you ever been the cause of the mommy sniff test? I mean your kid, not you personally. A few weeks ago at storytime I thought I saw Rissa make her pooping face just before the music instruments were brought out. I didn’t bother to check her because I knew there was no way she would leave for a change and miss out on music time.

It only lasts about five minutes, so I figured I’d change her after it was done. Before it ended I noticed several nearby moms sniffing their kids’ bottoms, trying to determine who crapped their pants.

Oops. I didn’t think anyone else would smell it! As I saw them start another round of sniffing I pointed at Riss and said “It’s mine…” as soon as the music stopped I hauled ass to the bathroom to change her.

But at least we didn’t get kicked out or fined. I swear there have been some crazy baby and toddler related potty stories lately. Did you hear about the mom who was fined $2,500 recently because her 3 year old peed on their front lawn? Apparently the ticket has been dropped, but goodness…he’s a kid! He doesn’t know about jaywalking let alone public urination laws.

Man, wonder what that cop would think if he hung out in my living room for a day. It’s not unusual for Rissa to take off her diaper (or be allowed airtime) but she doesn’t always hold it until we get a new diaper on or get her to the potty chair. It wouldn’t be much different to her to squat in the grass! Now I really need to make sure she stays away from the front window when she’s running around sans diaper.

And then there’s the poor woman who got kicked off the bus because her kid’s diaper was “too stinky.”  She had a way better reason than I did – the kid was sick! She was trying to get him to the doctor but he had the runs and filled his diaper. She couldn’t change him on the bus… but because of the stench she was kicked off about a half mile from the clinic. (And she was preggers too.)

I really felt for her. It’s not like they were trying to cause a problem and she was dealing with a sick baby. How come no one ever gets kicked off for nasty body odor? Some commenters say it was for health reasons… puh-lease. No one was going to be in danger because he was stinky. It’s not like they were smearing poop all over the place or something! Of course I don’t know her full story and am not focusing on how she contacted the news about it…. I’m just looking at the incident itself. Seems crappy to me (no pun intended).

Darcy Zalewski

Darcy is the founder of “Life With Darcy and Brian,” where she combines her love for education, board games, and crafting to create engaging learning experiences for kids. Her creative projects and writing have been featured in outlets like The Toy Insider, CafeMom, Mom.com, Parents.com, Country Living, and The Pioneer Woman.